Ok, first, get your mind out of the gutter. That is NOT what I’m talking about.
There are parents that make time to play with their children a priority. I envy these parents in that they can make it seem so easy. Sometimes, we (I’m categorizing all us parents so no one feels left out, lol.) get so wrapped up in what we are doing daily we forget the real important things…and people in our lives. With most children, its about quality time, not quantity. Where they are satisfied with a parents undivided attention for 10-15 minutes, and they are then content to go do their own thing for a while. (I see this with Trey when I almost kick his butt at Yugioh, he has to go rearrange the decks again – usually removing the good cards in my deck and putting them in his!!) As a parent, it is sometimes hard to just stop what we are doing and give them those precious ten minutes that are going to throw our whole schedule off. (If you are agreeing with me now, you are missing my point. That was sarcasm.) Ten minutes. People waste ten minutes waiting in line, debating if it’s take-out night or beanies and wienies for supper, or on their phones (have you ever really looked at how much time is wasted on social media, You tube and all that jazz?)
Pause. There is nothing wrong with those things. I am on You tube a lot, I will admit, watching other soaper’s videos, looking up herbal remedies, and learning how to pull my dishwasher apart. It’s amazing how helpful these “resources” can be. (That’s Dalton’s word when he’s doing homework and using the internet….using his resources. But wow, can he complain when he has to write a research paper!) These web resources are like one big community brain storm. However, if you think you have to post your daily life on social media or you will miss out on life….get help now. If parents gave their child/children the same amount of attention as was spent on their phone I believe our children would be a little more…..happy? (such a simple word with a wealth of meaning…) Can you imagine having an actual relationship with your child? A connection that nothing can sever?
Back to the play time. This is not meant to badger or judge anyone. I am so guilty of this myself. Close to 27 years of guilt that should just be let go. Next day, clean cup, move down. In short, a new day, a new start, a new habit can be born. It’s never too late. Even if your child is 27 years old! (Speaking of my girls – we have always talked about doing a formal-dress up tea party. For years. Really need to schedule that!) I’ve talked about our snow sledding days. I love sledding, and taking kids outside to pull them around on a sled, push them on a swing, or watch them play at a park. However, ……don’t you ever miss your own childhood? How about climbing a tree with them? (not the best example and not for everyone. Makes me think of The Sound of Music when all the kids are hanging from the trees!) Anyone miss playing cars in the dirt? Barbies? Having a teddy bear picnic? Blowing bubbles? Building sand castles? Fly a kite? (It sure has been windy enough here!) Setting up the My Little Pony stable beside the Master’s of the Universe castle? (It’s not the getting down on the ground that is hard- it’s the getting back up! LOL) Cards and boardgames are fun too. Let your child give you ideas.
I also feel this is easier to do when the children are younger. Teenagers act like parents have the plague- unless they want something. Lol. Trey is my youngest and depending on what he is into that day or week-that is what I am asked to play. Pokemon and Yugioh card games I suffer through. (and nobody else in the house will learn how to play) However, the boys bought these off road motorcycles (that’s what they call them…..it’s like calling a Prius a mini SUV.) Trey loves being part of the group. He does not like driving around by himself. So, the other night after listening to him begging Dillon into going back out driving one more time (it was almost dark outside), I told Trey I’d drive with him but just for a little bit. So, borrowing Dillon’s bike, Trey showed me all the important things (how to start it, how to make it go, most importantly where the brake is!) and we headed out. It’s a quarter of a mile from our house to the mail box. In that time Trey lectured about how I’m supposed to ride on the opposite side of the road than he was driving. I argued that since I was behind him it didn’t matter! Then Trey kept looking behind to see where I was (as if I couldn’t keep up with him! The nerve of that kid! Lol). I decided to pass him at the corner and headed on the path beside the cattle pens. I’d rather go up that hill than down it. Trey and I made one more loop. This time I was asked at every opportunity if I was having fun, and did I think it was fun? Two loops and it was almost full dark and I was frozen. However, right before I parked it, I decided….we as parents need way more play time with our kids !!!
Best story yet! Kids want our time, our eye contact, our smiles. And after sled riding a hot cup of cocoa! Thank you.